Regarding the first question, at times, the expectations were not aligned because one of the persons was not really listening. When meeting with the mentor, the mentee can always ask the mentor if it is okay to set a timer say 10-15 mins for him/her/them to describe the problem/issue without disruption, and ask the mentor to write down the questions and thoughts while listening such that they can discuss these questions and thoughts after the first 10-15 mins. This request may seem inconsiderate, however, from my own experience as a mentor, this act can totally improve the mentor-mentee conversation dynamics. I learned that at times a mentor would start giving advice without pausing in order to understand problem. Thank you!
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Silky S. K. Wong, Ph.D., S.E., P.E., CEng MICE, LEED AP
______________________
The Dow Chemical Company
Civil Engineering Department
Lead Civil/Structural Engineer TES
Central Engineering – Houston
HDC Phone : 281-966-2077
SSWong@...------------------------------
Original Message:
Sent: 01-24-2022 08:44 PM
From: Lynn Mayo
Subject: Thursdays @ 3 - Setting expectations around mentoring
I enjoyed being part of the virtual roundtable with @Steven McCutcheon and @Christopher Medora. Regarding the first question, I think a mentee needs to identify what they want from the mentor and clearly indicate that. They should then ask if that aligns with the mentor's expectations. If the two align, then the discussion should flow easily. My experience is that when the mentor isn't sure what the mentee wants from the relationship, it's often difficult. So ask and talk about that up front.
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Lynn Mayo P.E., M.ASCE
CEO
Potomac MD
Original Message:
Sent: 01-20-2022 08:36 PM
From: Tirza Austin
Subject: Thursdays @ 3 - Setting expectations around mentoring
Thank you to @Lynn Mayo, @Steven McCutcheon, and @Christopher Medora for sharing your insights on mentoring during today's Thursday @ 3 virtual roundtable.
We had a few questions we weren't able to answer on the call so I wanted to share them here. I look forward to reading your responses!
1. Are there specific questions a mentee needs to ask his/her mentor?
2. Is there a place for a retired civil engineer with significant management experience to act as a mentor.?
Thank you to everyone who joined the discussion today! I hope you take some time to check out ASCE Mentor Match. Happy Mentoring Month!
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Tirza Austin
Senior Manager, Online Community
American Society of Civil Engineers
1801 Alexander Bell Drive
Reston, VA 20191
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