I want to share this quote from another woman in industry from a side conversation about this topic that I think adds some good nuance to the subject:
"I agree with you that we shouldn't scare women out of going into math/science/engineering, but I do think we can prepare them for being in the minority. Not by creating fear, but by giving them confidence to stick it out even when it's hard.
I'm also raising my daughter to be aware that the world treats men and women differently. Not to scare her, but she needs that awareness. She needs to know that walking alone in a dark parking lot late at night is a bad idea. That's more about safety but I think of it in the same way as women in the workplace. They should be prepared for what they might encounter and if something happens, they should know what to do about it."
I really resonated with that last part. If something does happen, they need to know that it isn't just part of the job and to accept it. It is not acceptable, and they need to know to stand up for themselves and others if something isn't right.
When I was a graduate student, a professor offered me a research position, but the correspondence quickly turned to him asking for things that were very inappropriate. He was clearly trying to use the prestige of being asked to join his research to intimidate me into other things. I was in a foreign country, and our courses were all online because of the pandemic and some other factors, so I didn't personally know anyone in the administration. I had to figure out who I would even contact about it at the university, and I knew there was a risk that they would protect the professor instead of me. There was even a risk of losing my student visa and having to leave the country. I decided it was worth it because his actions were unacceptable, and I wasn't comfortable staying in his course. Thankfully the university acted quickly and appropriately, especially since the correspondence was digital and I had records to share with them. They found a replacement professor for the remainder of the course, and I thankfully faced no retaliation.
I share that story just to illustrate that I'm not so naive as to think that it is all sunshine and roses all the time. I know things can happen. I also know those things aren't limited to any specific career or field. But, I stand by the fact that so much progress has been made since the first women broke the norm and entered engineering careers, and there are so many women today in engineering who are thriving and supported at healthy firms.
I think a good way to prepare young women without scaring them is to state what appropriate and acceptable treatment is, and empower them to stand up if they encounter anything different. Let them know that there are wonderful places to work, they have so many opportunities ahead of them, and not to settle for less.
------------------------------
Heidi C. Wallace, P.E., M.ASCE
Tulsa, OK
------------------------------